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No potty breaks.
Dude, stop the truck.
You can leave us here. It's fine.
Hey, how far is the Lake?
'Bout a mile East.
Oh, perfect,
because I need a bath.
Not that I don't love this sexy, impulsive thing,
'cause I do,
but what are the chances we're gonna get lost,
and, you know, we're gonna die...
Horribly?
Look, you keep talking like that,
and you're gonna start lactating.
Wow.
So beautiful here.
Ooh.
And real scary, huh?
Okay, fine.
Make fun of me.
But when a Wolverine comes out and mauls you,
you're gonna be sorry.
And you're naked.
Oh, you noticed.
Hey, come on.
God.
Uh--
What are you laughing at?
I meant to do that.
You laughing at me?
Yeah. Huh? Hmm?
What's that?
Oh, come on. The water's cold.
It shrinks a little bit.
Shh.
I don't hear anything.
Come on.
I got an idea.
Oh, my God.
This is so naughty.
Mm.
Ow.
God, something bit me.
Oh, yeah, like perhaps Wolverine?
Ooh.
Oh, ah... Ah...
Aah!
Help!
Somebody help me!
Stop! Don't come near!
Aah!
Oh, my God! Jason!
Aah!
Hey, big guy.
You want to come inside?
Your mom needs some help.
Sure, dad.
Okay.
♪ ♪
aah!
Sadie!
No cell phone reception.
It's like, uh, we've gone back in time.
Ugh.
How can this place smell
of cookies and foot cream simultaneously?
Well, they were two of Aunt Sadie's favorite things.
That and dropping f-bombs.
Oh, I am not gonna miss that at Thanksgiving.
Didn't she always blame it on the dog?
Yeah.
You know, as, uh...
As both your wife and your Real Estate Agent...
Mm-hmm.
I can pretty much say with confidence
that most of this crap has got to go.
Huh.
Mm-hmm.
It's gonna be a huge job.
Yeah.
But we can't bring it all back to the house.
She--she was eccentric.
Really? Um, yeah.
A different word popped into my mind.
You know, everything's almost exactly how I remember it.
I mean, I never thought that...
Well, I never thought that we'd be cleaning out her cabin.
So...
Feel like I'm selling part of my childhood with this place.
I know, honey, but it's best we stay in town.
Mm.
Can I have that?
No.
Uh, yeah, sure. No.
Yes.
I have a--
I have a pop quiz for you, mister EPA scientist.
Uh-huh.
Okay, so what kind of animal
lives in a tank like that one?
Um...
The smart money's on that lizard right there.
What? Oh, is there nothing there?
That was probably my mistake.
Oh, you-- funny.
Freak out the city girl.
Just 'cause I don't share the Bickerman infatuation with--
what? Life? Nature?
Nature to you.
Disgusting creatures to me.
All right, well, heads up for both of you,
just--there might be an escaped lizard
somewhere in the house.
Can we keep it?
Absolutely not. No.
Besides, you already have a pet.
Crocodiles aren't pets.
Well, they are to some people, pal.
Not if they're stuffed.
You know what?
If we find any kind of vermin in the house,
your dad is gonna take care of it.
Mm-hmm. Uh...
Dad?
In a--in a completely humane way, of course.
Sure. Sit down.
Mr. Bickerman.
Hey. Nate. Nathan. Come on in.
Ah.
Sheriff Willinger.
Hey. Susan.
It's been a while.
Almost a year since Sadie passed.
I was going by, saw your vehicle.
I thought I'd drop in, say hey.
Yeah, of course.
Takes after Sadie, huh?
Uh, Connor, could you give us a minute, please?
Thanks.
Yeah, we, uh, we haven't told him, so...
Oh.
I don't blame you.
Boy his age, that would raise questions
you don't have answers to.
Hell, I'd like to know
what your aunt was doing feeding wild crocs.
Well, she was lonely.
I mean, I know-- we live in town.
We don't get out here that much.
And with--you know, since Connor was born,
and our jobs, it's...
Well, there's never enough time.
And now the place is for sale?
Took a year for us to drive out here
to clean up Sadie's stuff.
It's--you know, believe me,
this isn't easy for me.
If we had a choice, we probably wouldn't even sell it.
Yeah, but it's not like we can come out here
and have a picnic and forget about what happened.
I--I don't even like bringing Connor here
for a few hours.
Well, that's understandable.
I'd like you to know that, uh...
Whoa.
I've been all over that Lake.
Back to front, top to bottom,
had a sonar rig brought in,
and I can tell you, ma'am,
there ain't nothing swimming in that Lake
bigger than a trout.
Yeah, but you can never be sure, right?
Uh, ma'am, when my predecessor left the job,
the county wanted to hire somebody...
Hey, where you going?
Who could guarantee what happened here
didn't happen again, and that's me.
Now, you're gonna have to trust me, you know?
I've seen things that are a lot worse
than what happened here.
Hell, I had a 6'5" cross-dresser
come at me with a machete.
What I'm trying to say is
in this world, it's the people you got to worry about,
not the animals.
I'm gonna-- I'm gonna be on my way.
Sure, Sheriff.
Thank you for coming by.
You take care now.
All I'm saying is that if the Lake is clear,
there's no reason to sell.
Nathan, we didn't even come here when Sadie was alive.
I know.
I mean, no one knows better than you
how bad the market is right now.
I'm just saying why don't we wait?
You know, test it out.
We could... Please?
You know what? Fine. Okay.
We can wait until the market recovers,
but Connor is not swimming in that Lake.
Done.
But he's not gonna make any friends
if we keep dragging him off to the middle of nowhere.
Well... Connor?
Where'd he go?
I don't know.
Come here, little guy.
I'm not gonna hurt you.
Whoa.
Looks like I got a pet after all.
Lots of 'em.
Connor.
Don't run off without telling us, okay?
Sorry.
Come on.
We're driving back to town.
Mm. It's 6:00 A.M. and you're not on the trail.
You're going soft on me?
Yeah.
I thought you had a big day.
I do.
Don't I at least get a "good morning"?
Uh, sorry.
Um, we lost another one.
Oh.
Uh, the signal from the elk's radio collar went erratic,
and then we lost it completely yesterday afternoon, so...
This one is gonna be the last one.
Meaning you know what's been happening to them?
Uh, I think it's a poacher.
I think they're bringing hunters onto state land.
I think it's a business, and...
I, uh, hope you find your bad guy, Hmm?
Good morning.
Oh, and don't forget to say goodbye
to your zoologist in training.
Right. Right.
Hey, is Vica coming by today?
Uh, she has to take her dog to the vet.
Something about it having another panic attack,
but, um, I promised Connor
I would spend the day with him anyway, so...
Hey, Connor?
I'm heading out the door.
You want to say goodbye to me before I leave?
Love you.
Goodbye? When did you get back?
Uh, late last night.
Something came up at work,
and I will tell you all about it when I get home.
But, dad--
I got to go, okay?
Bye.
♪ ♪
God, mother of--ugh.
Next year you are going to summer school.
You been on there all morning.
When are you gonna be done?
Soon, honey.
There are a lot of cabins that need renting,
and I have so many people counting on me.
Two hours tops, okay?
I promise.
Honey, why don't you just go play outside?
Connor?
Feeding time.
That's all I got.
Hey, no eating the cook.
I'll try to bring more next time.
Where is it?
Round back.
Tried to take a chunk out of one of my customers.
It's wicked big.
I think it came up through the toilet.
You're wasting my time.
Take it easy, Tony.
I wish I could believe you.
It was a one-night stand, Marsha.
She meant nothing to me.
I have absolutely no feelings for her.
He was kissing Jessica before the last commercial.
...Little one?
The little one with the same hair and eyes as yours?
Susan?
Susan meant absolutely nothing to me.
Where's my mom?
Connor, where have you been?
Forgot my phone.
Where are you going?
Oh, honey, I am so sorry,
but I have a, uh, thing.
What was I saying?
Um, I have a last-minute open house,
so I am gonna leave you with Vica
for the rest of the day,
and tomorrow we will go see a movie.
I promise.
But you said that we'd--
Connor, this is important.
Please understand.
But I need to show you something.
Well, show me when I get home.
I love you so much.
Bye.
♪ ♪
You got to stay away from those cookies, boy.
You seem to have gained quite a bit of weight
since I last saw you.
About two minutes ago?
I, uh...
If it were me, I kick your little butt.
Parents' number.
And not a fake one, either.
Got to be here somewhere...
Oh, my God!
Sorry. Sorry?
Yeah, thanks.
Think you knocked out a filling.
Well, I know the name of a good dentist in town,
if you need one.
Ah, thanks for the tip.
Maybe we can call him with your space phone.
Space pho--yeah. Good one.
No, it's-- it's a radar antenna.
Um, are you okay?
Yeah. I'll let you know.
I'm a zoologist.
I'm doing a project for the EPA on elk, so...
Elk?
Like deer with big antlers?
Yeah, but don't tell the deer that.
Seriously, Connor? Stealing meat?
No, I...
Mr. Dimitri, I am so sorry.
He's never done anything like this before.
Oh, really? Hmm.
Yeah, uh, he just loves meat.
Ever since he was wee high.
Well, goodie goodie for him.
All he has to do now is pay for it.
Nobody wants to buy used meat.
No, of course.
It's not for me. It's for--
Connor, I want you to go straight home
and wait for me in your room.
Mo-- now.
Look, I promise this will never happen again.
He's a good kid, really.
He's just... He's a little bored.
And that is my fault, not his.
So how much do I owe you?
Uh, just to let you know,
the chicken went off sale yesterday.
So are they usually like that?
Well, unless there's a species of flying elk head
I haven't heard of,
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say no.
Sorry. Excuse me.
Hello?
Hey. I just got pulled away
from one of the biggest commissions of my life
to bail your son from Dimitri's,
where he was being held for shoplifting.
Shoplifting?
Um--okay.
Tell Dimitri we'll pay for whatever candy bar he stole.
Oh, I paid for it, honey,
but, uh, it wasn't candy.
Mm-mm. No, he had a backpack full of meat.
He's--he's stealing meat?
Yeah.
And, uh, apparently he's taken up smoking.
Smoking?
Mm.
So remind me to put a lock on the wine cabinet.
He said they're Vica's,
but she doesn't even smoke.
And, speaking of Vica,
why are we paying her to sit at home and watch tv
whilst Connor is out shoplifting?
Well, at least we're keeping one of 'em off the street.
Did we not feed Connor the right things as a baby?
I mean, did I eat too much chili
when he was in my womb,
and now he's a sociopath?
He's not a sociopath.
I mean, every kid does something like this at some point.
He's just-- he's being a little boy.
A little boy who's been unsupervised.
Okay. Put him on the phone.
I want to talk to him.
I sent him home.
Sorry about your day.
For what it's worth,
mine isn't going much better.
Really?
Sorry.
Okay, well, um, I'll see you at home.
Okay. Bye, babe.
Yeah? And I just--
I hope you don't become a vegetarian anytime soon.
I'm voting for pork chops.
Bye.
Sorry about that.
Cell reception out here
is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.
Hey, what could have eaten the body?
A--a bear?
I told you I saw cougar tracks over there.
He wasn't asking you, Charlie.
He was asking the zookeeper.
Zoologist.
Isn't that what I said?
No.
Uh, I don't think it was a bear.
But it may have been a cougar.
What did I say?
A cougar named Reba.
♪ She walks so tall ♪
♪ and she's taking it all babe ♪
yeah.
Excuse me, sugar, could you pick that up?
Oh, thank you, handsome.
You can keep it.
Why would a hunter chop off the head?
Yeah, isn't the head supposed to be the best part?
Well, uh, that's what I keep trying to tell you,
but you don't want to go for it.
Well, it doesn't make rational sense, no,
but that might be the point.
She might be trying to mess with me.
Hunters are weird.
Yes.
So if it wasn't this cougar Lady,
then what was it?
I don't know.
Look, if you guys run into any trouble,
there's a cabin just on the other side of that point.
You can duck in there if you'd like, okay?
Yeah. What kind of trouble?
Just be safe.
And don't mess with the elk.
All right. Sorry.
Hope you find your moose killer.
Elk.
Whatever.
Excuse me. Is there a Reba around here anywhere?
Thanks.
Excuse me. You Reba?
Depends on who's asking.
I contacted you. I'm Brett.
Then that would make me Reba.
Have a seat.
Now, if I may say so,
that photo in your ad,
it just don't do you no justice, Reba.
Now, my good Buddy Walt here and myself,
we thought we were just getting ourselves a hunting guide,
but, girl, you are one fine package.
Well, aren't you just such a sweet-talker.
Once we're miles away from civilization,
been out there a few days,
missed everything you've shot at
and your belly starts grumbling,
you're gonna appreciate my aim
a lot more than my other assets.
If you receive my meaning.
Well, I, for one, am a multitasker,
and I plan on appreciating both.
So, uh, Brett, was it?
How'd you hear about Reba?
Internet.
How about you two load your gear into my truck?
It's the big one out front.
Boat on the back, gun rack up front.
Mildly offensive bumper sticker.
You'll see.
Let's go, Walt.
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
All right.
Here.
Thank you.
So, uh, Brett?
Mm.
Uh, you play your cards pretty close to the vest,
but, um, I think I deserve to know
what you're really doing here.
Your website said that you--
I don't have a website.
Well, let's just say you're kind of a legend.
Legend?
Of what sort?
Bigfoot? Crop circles?
Global warming?
No.
You know how to find things that don't want to be found.
I'm looking for a girl.
Girl that hangs out in the Woods?
Or the Lake. Not really sure.
All right, look.
I don't have a chance of finding her on my own,
and you're the only guide that goes into the area.
All right then.
Elks for the yahoos.
One, uh, Lois lane for Superman here.
Where is it?
Oh, the meat stealer.
Your mother called. Go to room.
Lost something? Like a lighter?
Give it back.
You tried to get me in trouble
by putting this and the cigarettes in my backpack.
Give it back right now.
Oh, and you can ask my mom for the cigarettes.
Connor!
Come back here!
Your mother will be mad at me.
Okay, so I'm down to one hot dog.
You guys are gonna have to share.
Connor!
It was here.
Nathan, I am sick and tired
of these false alarms and pranks.
Now, I drove all the way out here
because you promised me a bloody mess.
Now where is it?
It was right here.
Teddy, stay.
Come on, Teddy. Get away from there.
Wait.
Teddy, no.
Watch yourself.
Teddy, no. Come back, Teddy.
No.
Ugh.
It's a stick.
Yeah.
Poor Teddy.
Now I know why you have a panic attack.
Ugh!
Aah!
How many elk did you say you've lost?
In the last six months?
Too many.
And I'm starting to think it's not a poacher.
Hey, I checked that Lake three times,
and, Nathan, I swear to God,
my eyes were open the whole time.
Now, look, I may be from the city,
but I know my way around the wilderness.
Last time you checked that Lake
was a year and a half ago.
And things change.
Now, we owe it to the community
to make sure that Lake is clear.
I don't live with my head in the sand.
I need evidence.
Well, what if something just came and ate it?
And what if the evidence is a stick, huh?
I don't have sophisticated sonar equipment.
We'd have to order it in.
That would take days.
Okay.
But we do have the next best thing back at the station.
Well, great.
So you and I, we'll go back,
we'll come here, we'll check the Lake.
Nothing would make me happier than for you to be right.
All right.
Let's go fishing.
Yes, dear.
Uh-huh.
Why don't you do that?
I bought this with my own money.
You know, in New York City
we got people who swear they've seen Elvis
at 63rd and Park.
And we got people who swear they've been abducted by aliens,
and, yes, we've even got people
who swear they've seen albino crocodiles in the subways.
Sheriff! Shut up.
Wow.
That's a little much for Aroostook County,
don't you think?
I believe a boy scout...
Should always be prepared.
Especially one from Jersey.
Think the sun is, uh...
Better over here.
Connor?
Connor, are you here?
I know I told you to go straight home.
Connor!
Mom.
I think I did something bad.
Sweetie, is that blood?
No, it's not my blood.
It's--I was by the Lake.
Aah!
In the water!
It's in the water!
Whoo!
Ooh!
You coming, Ellie?
Isn't it a little cold?
That's why we came out here.
Get out into the real world.
The way things used to be.
You know, when our ancestors came here
there were no heated pools.
They didn't have iPods either,
but I noticed you brought yours.
Hey, at least you got away from he who must not be named.
Yeah, let's not talk about it, okay?
I bought a new bikini for this trip,
so I have to use it whether the water is freezing or not.
See, now she's got the right idea.
Or I have a better idea.
Why don't we all just jump in naked?
That'd be hilarious, right?
You guys first.
It worked.
Yeah, I guess the image of you naked really did the trick.
Shh.
He actually thought we were gonna jump in there naked.
I know. He is so-- obnoxious, right?
I was gonna say funny.
You're kidding.
Not like "I'm gonna sleep with him" funny,
but like "I'd set him up with one of my fat friends" funny.
Like you have any fat friends.
Clarissa put on a ton of weight recently.
Tara, she's pregnant.
And fat.
It's not all baby.
She's not giving birth
to, like, Andre the freaking giant.
Have you heard from Brett lately?
No. If I wanted to talk to Brett,
I would have brought my phone.
I'm gonna let him stew for a few days.
Or weeks. I haven't decided.
Does he know about you and Aaron?
What? No. There's nothing to know.
Seriously, there's nothing.
Yeah, right.
You ready?
Yeah, let's go.
It's gonna be cold.
Oh, gosh!
Oh, my God!
What's going on?
Ah, I can't get through to my wife.
I haven't been able to get through to mine since '86.
Connor, try 911 again.
Oh, it won't go through.
Uh, Vica--Vica, hold still, honey.
This is gonna hurt even worse.
Ow!
Connor, uh, find me something to soak up the blood.
Now. Now. Now.
Well, Suzy isn't gonna believe this.
I mean, "oh, what'd you do today?"
"Well, I hunted a crocodile."
You're all worked up over this, aren't ya?
Yeah.
Okay. Uh...
Sorry.
Okay.
Uh, Connor, start talking.
I just wanted a pet.
Sweetie, what was it?
Mom!
Oh.
Hey, Suze, guess what?
...Vica...
You there?
...Can you hear...
Okay, Suze, try to speak a little more slowly
and calm down.
...At the cabin.
She's at the cabin. She's terrified.
...And--and I don't know...
Okay. Hey, Su--
Come on. Let's load the guns.
It's not that I didn't want to let the poor bastard live.
It's just how many times do you get to shoot a giraffe?
Hey.
Anyway, the zoo demoted me
to the souvenir shop after that.
Can you imagine?
You're joking, right?
You shot an animal in captivity?
Just further proving that my philosophy is correct.
Hunting's not fair.
So there's no point pretending otherwise.
What's that?
This is what guarantees you a shot at the big game.
Big game is what you're after, right, Brett?
Nothing like shooting and eating an animal
you're not supposed to.
Stop the boat.
Uh, I usually don't take orders,
but I'll let that one slide.
What'd you see, college boy? A turtle?
Shh. Quiet.
Okay, that one I'm not gonna let slide.
That's gonna cost you an extra 20.
What did you see?
Did you see Vica get bitten?
No.
Then whose blood is this?
Teddy's.
He went too close to the water,
and I tried calling him,
and he wouldn't listen.
Mom?
Yeah.
I fed them.
What?
The meat from our freezer.
That's why I stole from the store,
because I couldn't feed them enough.
That's why they ate Vica's dog.
Connor.
You've been coming here when we told you not to?
On my bike.
You knew there were dangerous animals in the Lake
and you didn't tell us?
You would have made dad kill them.
Oh, my God. No, no, sweetie.
He would have... He would never have done that.
He would have moved them and taken them someplace safe.
She gonna be okay?
I don't know, sweetie.
I...
Try the phone again please.
Okay.
Okay, uh, Connor, we have to get Vica into the car
and get her to the hospital, okay?
Yeah, but what if they come back?
Doesn't all this take some of the fun out of it?
You know what?
You're right.
Think that actually we should track their footprints
and sniff the ground to see where they mark their territory.
All right, guys, close enough.
We'll let your predator instincts
take over from here, okay?
Yep. All right.
This is the fun part.
Oh!
Walt! Walt! Walt!
No!
No, get off of me.
Hurry up.
Look, it's a crocodile.
Come on. Get her here.
Get off of me!
No, don't be an idiot!
Get off!
Damn it!
That ain't right.
That ain't anything close to right.
We need to get the hell out of here.
Yeah, to where?
Hey, you're the guide. You tell me.
No. No. We can't just leave Walt.
Oh, of course we can.
Something just ripped him to pieces back there.
But I know. Let's all get back in the water.
You grab an arm, you grab a leg,
and I'll just bring up the rear.
Shut up.
Shut up?
Just calm down.
Shut up? Come on.
You shut up. Hey!
Aah!
Someone needs to check her for ticks.
Okay, Charlie.
Enough's enough.
This isn't funny anymore.
Get your ass back here.
God, which direction did he go?
Knowing Charlie,
he's probably finding a quiet spot to whack off.
Oh, why did we have to bring him?
It gives me the creeps.
Shouldn't have brought either of them.
Would have given us a chance to be alone
and get to know each other better.
So that's what this is about, huh?
I thought it was pretty obvious.
You know, the first time I met you...
Well, uh, you had me after hello.
Look, let's find Charlie first, okay?
Then we can talk about what other movie lines you know.
First you said you didn't like it out here.
And then it was too cold.
Now you want to waste your time looking for Charlie goofball.
You certainly bitch and moan a lot.
You know, I thought you'd be grateful I asked you along
considering the alternative.
You guys?
Charlie? Is that you?
Mail-order piece of crap.
Doesn't work.
Here.
This is for you.
This has got explosive shells in it.
And this, this is a shark stick.
Works like a shotgun, but underwater.
One shot from this, it'll take the head
right off a great white.
You're not a tranquilizer dart sort of guy, are you?
Damn straight.
If we run into this mythical crocodile of yours,
let's get one thing straight.
I don't want any of your epa endangered species crap.
Are we on the same page?
Yeah.
God, Charlie.
If you want to be a peeping Tom,
I'll save you the trouble.
What the--? It's another one of those deer things.
Ellie. Aaron.
What was that?
Shh, shh, shh.
Where'd it come from?
Not even sure I heard it.
Aah! Ellie!
So what do you think did this?
I'll bet it was a shark.
A big shark. A Megalodon.
A Megalo--what?
What the hell have you been smoking?
That's Charlie Berman.
He's a college student.
He's here on a backpacking trip.
He's friends with this guy I know.
I came out here to find my girlfriend,
to stop her from doing something stupid.
Yeah, well, it seems like coming out here
was already pretty stupid.
Sorry about your friend.
Oh, I hated him.
He's an idiot.
And a pervert.
Yeah? Then I'm sorry he smells so bad.
So what we do now?
In your case, I'd finish High School.
Until then, get back to the Lake and find our guns.
They're back!
Connor, come away from the window.
They can smell you through the glass.
Is that true?
I don't know, honey. Just...
Connor-- dad!
Nathan!
Susan!
Stay away from the window!
Uh, the bathroom.
There's thick walls in the bathroom.
Help me with Vica.
Let them get closer.
The blanket.
Here we go.
Five...
Four...
Three...
Down, honey, down.
Two...
One.
Honey, it's fine.
Stay here, okay?
But, mom--
Connor.
Aah!
Oh, my God.
Nathan.
You okay?
Where's Connor?
Dad!
Connor.
Hey, you okay? Yeah.
Tony?
Open up.
I officially owe you an apology.
Great.
Now she's gone.
Where the hell is she?
Tara!
No.
No, no.
She--she was...
It's okay. It's okay.
Come on. Come on.
It's okay. It's okay.
Don't worry. Don't worry.
It's gonna be okay.
Could be a gator.
I'm sure she's fine,
this damsel in distress of yours.
This is about another guy.
Yeah, she goes on a camping trip without you,
so you hire a hunting guide
to help you stalk her through a state forest.
Totally normal.
For a complete jealous psycho.
What'd she do?
Forget her chastity belt at home?
It's a little more complicated than that.
And it's not your damn problem.
Not my problem?
Hey, getting you all back in one piece
is my responsibility,
and I take it very seriously,
thank you very much.
So the least you could do is drop your, uh,
"I got a stick up my college-educated butt" attitude.
Yes.
She came with another guy.
Damn, I'm good.
Hey.
Guess what I found.
Now, before we all got
unceremoniously jacked from my boat,
we were following a tracking signal from an elk.
Now, that elk, it seems,
is actually passing through the digestive tract of our gator.
I'm sorry to put it this way,
but predators go to where their food is,
so whatever killed smelly over there
knows where your girlfriend is.
Now all we have to do is follow him.
Come on, baby.
Come on. Talk to mama.
Yes.
Nothing bigger than a trout?
Hmm.
I'd say that thing's a little bigger than a damn trout!
It was just a job for you.
But everyone I have left is in this room,
and they're in danger because I trusted you.
It's got to be 25 feet long!
I screwed up.
Is that what you want to hear? I'm sorry.
The big one, I have no idea.
It could have been dropped from the sky.
Yeah, dropped from...
The--the elk.
Three years ago, the EPA reintroduced elk
just down the River.
Predators move towards their food.
It is possible that they didn't show up on your sonar
because it wasn't in the Lake.
Question is why'd they come back here?
I don't...
I mean, did the big one follow the elk into the area?
I don't know.
It's an answer for the big one,
but the smaller ones,
they've been here for months.
Talk to your son.
Uh, hey, I'm, uh...
I'm gonna go check and see what kind of shampoo you use.
You knew about that?
Come here. Come here.
Is this where you've been going on your bike every day?
You know, they almost killed Vica.
You know they can kill you.
Never hurt me.
Listen.
They're not your friends.
They're wild animals,
and wild animals live by a set of rules
to ensure their survival.
One of the rules
is that they eat anything smaller than they are.
Do you understand that?
They're not your friends.
It was just something cool to play with.
Both of you left me alone.
You care more about your stupid elk than me,
and mom's always working.
You know, I thought it was a rule of nature
that parents took care of their kids.
My mistake.
Hey.
So...
Still think we can get a good price for this place?
It's a... Fixer-upper.
Real curb appeal.
Pets included.
Yeah.
And I--I, for one,
am ready to say goodbye to lakeside living forever.
Sweets, I think we should make a break for it.
I don't think Vica's gonna make it if we wait,
and we still have a couple hours of daylight left.
Yeah, but she can't walk.
We can carry her.
I know you're scared.
But...But with Willinger covering us,
we should be able to make it.
Okay.
Sure?
Mm.
We're gonna have to get the car close
if we're gonna get everyone inside.
Okay. All right.
Okay.
Connor.
Take care of your mother, okay?
Okay.
Okay?
Hmm?
Looks like we're actually gonna do this thing.
I love you.
Um...
If something happens--
it won't.
But if it does,
I'll keep Connor safe, okay?
Well, I was gonna say come save us.
Let's do this.
♪ ♪
Come on. Come on.
Go.
Let's go.
I'm trying!
That one's new.
Mom, what are you doing?
Connor, stay here. I mean it.
You have to press the red button.
What?
How do you know that stuff?
It's always the red button.
Mom!
Susan! Get back in the house!
Susan!
Mom!
Hey.
Get away from her!
No, no, no. No, no, no.
Aah!
Susan, get into the cabin!
Connor.
Go! Go! Go!
It's locked!
Vica!
Vica, open the door!
Vica! Vica!
Open the door!
Aah!
Go quick.
Back there.
I want to help.
Now, Connor!
Vica! Vica!
It's coming through. Okay.
Hurry. Aah!
Got us turned round.
I don't even know which way camp was.
I heard a noise towards this way.
You heard gunshots.
Do you really want to go towards gunshots?
We want to go towards people.
Oh!
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God.
We need to get the hell away from here. Now.
Tara!
Who the hell cares about Tara?
Get up. Don't cry. Come on.
I'm not gonna say it again.
Get up, damn it.
Stop being a little bitch and get up.
Look, I'm going this way with or without you.
It's Brett. It's Brett's jacket.
I don't know what the hell is going on here...
I think he's looking for me!
You can't be serious.
You think Brett gives a rat's ass about you?
You think he cares enough about you
to get his shoes dirty?
If that were true,
you wouldn't be here with me in the first place.
He's cheating on you, Ellie,
and everybody at school knows it but you.
No, no. Maybe he-- he heard the gunshots,
or maybe-- maybe he fired them.
Why do you put him on such a pedestal?
He doesn't give a rat's ass about you.
He told me so himself.
He's not out looking for you.
He's back at school
probably in some freshman's dorm room right now.
We got a camp a few miles away from here.
We find the camp and we can find our way home.
No. No, no. We've been turned around for an hour now.
The only way we know is towards the gunshots.
Make your choice.
Let someone who really cares about you save you,
or you can go crying to Brett.
Like usual.
No.
Please don't leave me.
You go in that direction, and you're walking alone.
Please come with me.
Aaron!
Aaron.
This is actually the most fun I've had in quite a while.
Mm-hmm.
Some fun.
Can't tell if I'm excited,
or if I'm gonna throw up in my mouth from the terror.
Just in case it's the latter.
All right.
We don't even know what the hell this thing is yet,
and I'm already picking out a spot on my wall for its head.
You know what?
Maybe it's mutated and has two heads.
If that happens to be the case,
I get 'em both.
If there's three heads, you can have one.
Guys, I can hear you. My girlfriend?
If he wants one of the heads,
I'm not giving him one of mine.
Can't have mine, neither.
I didn't come out here to fight wild animals.
Hey, hey, you know what?
Look, we can't find your girlfriend
if we're all gator crap.
Last chance, Brett.
You gonna tell us why you're stalking your own girlfriend?
Oh, wait a minute.
If this is about a restraining order,
there are ways around that.
Believe me. I know.
She's being lied to.
About me.
There's this guy, Aaron.
He's a grad student.
He was tutoring her for a while.
He told her there was another girl,
and he used that opportunity to get between us.
And now he takes her with him on this trip,
and you can only guess what he's hoping to do with her.
I love it out here.
Hmm.
Where's Dr. Phil when you need him?
Who's Dr. Phil?
It's not her.
Oh, my God. It's Tara.
Brett, get back.
It's her best friend. She must be close.
We got to find her.
Ellie! Can you hear me?
Shut up!
Well, that's one way to bring 'em closer.
Can you hear me?
Shut up.
Jonas, you ready for this?
Try not to mess up its head.
Heads.
Ellie!
Whoo-hoo!
Oh, man.
That's got to be the hottest thing I ever seen.
Aah!
He's awake.
Get Connor ready to run.
Aah!
Need a bigger gun. Definitely need a bigger gun.
Wait!
Stop!
Aah!
What was I thinking?
Give me that.
I'm afraid that I have to ban you
from ever participating
in one of my hunting expeditions ever again.
Something in the contract
about not blowing holes in the guide.
Yeah, no complaints from me.
That bastard ruined my pants.
And he stole my knife.
Well, you stabbed him in the face.
Yeah, I know.
And I would have carved my name in his hide
had it not got stuck in his head.
As for your belly aching... Ugh.
It's not the first time I've been shot by someone I know.
Ugh! God.
It is the first time I've been hit.
I'm afraid I'm not gonna be able to walk out of here.
The boat.
The boat. Yeah.
Getting in the water sounds like a fine idea to me, college boy.
Well, unless you can think of another way.
Actually, no, I can't.
No way to keep our orientation
with the sun going down.
When we get in the boat, where do we go?
Only one place to go.
There's a cabin on the other side of the Lake.
I'm having a bit of a misunderstanding with the owner,
so if anybody's there when we get there,
just keep the elk poaching on the down-low.
Ugh.
I'm the one with the injured leg, Rambo, okay?
Let's go.
What about Ellie?
We can't go looking for her now.
We wouldn't know where to look.
You think she's dead, don't you?
I didn't say that.
Look, I can't know for sure,
but we wouldn't do her any good
if we get ourselves killed, would we?
Those were crocodiles.
I've read enough about crocodiles
to know that they don't stop killing food
just because they're full.
They also don't travel very far if they don't have to.
She's nearby.
Whatever you do, do not start screaming
like you did the last time.
She's my girlfriend!
If you had any kind of normal relationships,
you'd understand.
Jonas and I chase after a killer crocodile for you,
practically playing 20 questions
trying to figure out what would drive you
to follow Ellie in here to begin with,
and, may I point out,
that we didn't even know the damsel's name
until you start screaming it at the top of your lungs,
attracting that monster that came out of the Woods
and bit off Jonas' head.
And how the hell do you know
I don't have any normal relationships, huh?
I know all about you.
All about your boo-hooing about miss Ellie.
But you ask me one question?
One question about me and my life?
Okay.
Do you have a boyfriend?
No.
No, I don't have a boyfriend, dumbass!
That was hypothetical.
Now that you know all about me,
let's get in the boat
and go someplace safe.
No, I won't.
Really?
Not without Ellie.
Yeah?
Ugh.
Fine.
We'll see how you like being dragged.
Johnny law.
Nathan, actually.
I would have introduced myself last time,
but when I asked for your hunter's license,
you spit tobacco juice on my shoes.
Yeah? I'm a shy girl.
You know, you got a bit of an infestation
of a very unusual variety out there.
Yeah, looks like they got you pretty bad.
There were four of us.
And the other two...
Didn't fare... As--as well.
But the crocs didn't shoot me.
That one did.
I already said I was sorry.
Thanks for taking us in,
but we need to get back out there.
I'm Brett, by the way.
Uh, Nathan. Hey.
Uh, Susan. This is Connor.
Why would you want to go back outside? Are you crazy?
Because my girlfriend's out there on the Lake.
We were looking for her
when Reba decided to come here instead.
It's better off behind a closed door
than running around in the dark.
Exactly why we need to get back on the boat
and find Ellie.
Well, we've been trapped in here for hours,
and there's the very real possibility
that help isn't coming.
And we can't let you take our only means of transportation
and go and get yourself killed.
Especially when that only means of transportation
belongs to me.
We get back in the boat, we find Ellie,
and then we get the hell away from here.
Ellie's on the Lake.
Now we need to get to safety.
That's connecting to the River and going down to town.
Those are opposite directions.
No, this isn't up for debate.
We're not leaving her.
You don't even know where she is.
Now, my wife and my son are right here,
and I can't risk their lives
based upon the chance or the possibility
that she might be out there.
Sensible conversation didn't get me very far with her.
I'm sorry to have to do this.
I already shot someone today.
I don't mind doing it again.
Get away from the door.
Now's a fine time to grow yourself a pair.
I will come back for you. I promise.
Just as soon as I find her.
Ah.
Ellie!
Brett?
Ellie!
Brett!
Ellie!
Brett!
Back sooner than I thought.
Brett. Brett!
I'm coming back!
Brett, I'm here!
Ellie!
I'm here, baby. I'm here. I knew.
Brett!
Connor, get to the bathroom and lock the door!
Go!
Aah!
Brett!
No. No.
Oh, my God, Brett. I knew. I knew.
Get away from the water!
What?
Get away from the water!
Ellie!
Oh, my God!
What is that?
I'm so sorry.
Hey, hey, no. You don't need to apologize.
For going with him. With Aaron.
Shh. No, you don't have to apologize.
I love you.
Ellie, go.
Go. Now. Go. Run. Now.
Aah!
What is--what is that?
Oh, my God!
Aah!
Nicely done.
Let's get the hell out of here. Now.
Ugh.
Ow! Ah.
It's okay.
I can always come back for the head later.
Connor, stay close.
Oh. Hey, hey, hey.
Hey, hey, hey.
What happened?
It killed--it killed him.
Who? Who? Brett.
Nathan, the boat! Now!
Right. Go, go, go. Connor, come.
You okay?
Keep trying.
Okay. Plan B.
Ugh! Ugh!
Aah!
Here we go.
Yeah. I think we're safe.
What is that?
Go. Go. Go.
Come on. Go.
Connor?
Hello? Hello?
Come on!
Over there.
What makes you think Dimitri's not gonna have locked his doors?
Ugh!
What now?
Aah!
After you.
Okay, let's put her down.
I'll call for help.
All right.
Does anybody have a quarter?
No. No.
It's 911. You don't need any money.
Okay.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
No. It's gonna be okay.
We're gonna get out of here.
What about Connor and...
This is all my fault.
I should have been there for him.
This is my fault.
Oh, it's you.
Little Bickerman.
Don't you--
oh, my God! Run! Go! Go! Go!
Run! Go! Go!
Aah!
Help!
Aah!
Help me!
Aah!
Connor, Susan, back door's open!
Go!
No keys.
Don't you know how to hotwire?
I'm a zoologist.
Connor!
Connor?
Keys.
This is the one and only time
you're allowed to steal something.
Connor.
Are we 07 or 08?
07!
Connor!
Dad, lighter!
Nathan!
No, dad!
I'd like to present you today
an absolutely extraordinary case,
and proof that we are not in control.
We are not in control of our jobs.
We are not in control of our children.
And we are certainly not in control of this planet.
There are no hard and fast rules in nature.
There's no way to create a system
by which we can catalog
and analyze and predict where an animal is gonna go,
or what an animal is gonna do.
Having said all that,
I would like to now regale you
with a story of a most unique species--
the Maine River Crocodile.
For the record,
it's extinct.
Come along.
So, uh, did you guys have time to read the pamphlets?
Anyone?
-- Sync, corrected by elderman -- -- for www.addic7ed.com --